


all is fair

by sowish



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: F/F, all together it's a gay mess!!!, also knw this! jiwoo says fuck date rape drugs!, also this is kinda hyunjin-centered but dont fret!!, amature rebel heejin, but. .. .she does. ., chaotic mess chuulip, chuulip's just a side ship!!!, feat. hyunjin's daddy issues, i mean not literally, rich girl hyunjin, think more like frozen toblerone getting melted into a soft gooey mess, this is not your enemies to lovers trope
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-26
Updated: 2019-05-26
Packaged: 2020-03-19 16:28:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18973756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sowish/pseuds/sowish
Summary: Hyunjin doesn’t like wasting her time and breaking rules, but, she likes Heejin so if there’s rules she needs to break to get to her, she will.(But really, all Heejin does is trespass into private property, vandalize, and steal flowers from dead people.)





	all is fair

**Author's Note:**

> i have So Many ideas roaming around in my head (and in my notes app) and this wasn't one of the ones that i planned on writing. this one just....POOFED into existence.

Being the daughter of an affluent businessman, Hyunjin had her life planned out for her. She had been enrolled in nothing but the most prestigious schools, signed up for after school curriculars, and had her own peers with equally affluent parents as her own. Hyunjin grew up thinking of people as assets and investments she could capitalize on for her own good. It’s why she refused to hang out with people her father told her to stay away from, why she only befriended those who could benefit her gain. Hyunjin shoulders the responsibilities and expectations her father projects on her without complaint.

 

It’s easy pleasing him. All she needs to do is stay at the top of the ranks in school, network with others, and keep her behavior in line. Hyunjin doesn’t necessarily care for breaking the rules; it just isn’t worth her time. Rules exist for a reason and Hyunjin doesn’t see the gain in breaking guidelines whose purpose is to keep everything contained and organized. All her father wanted from Hyunjin is the ability to take over the family business in the future and to keep a white as snow slate of behavior. A bad reputation is the death of success. And Hyunjin will be damned before she gets herself caught in fraudulent behavior. She works way too hard to please her father to be anything less than perfect. (More important to her than inheriting the business was keeping her father happy with her. She yearned for his praise and positive attention. If she had that, it meant that he would respect her. Hyunjin learned early on that her father couldn’t care less about love. She grew to be okay without her own father’s love, but, came to desperately need his respect to live a peaceful life. Her father is overbearing and controlling and if Hyunjin couldn’t control her life, her father would have no problem puppeteering hers. And to the extent of control that Hyunjin has, she knows it’s the most freedom she’ll ever get from him.)

 

In her junior year of high school when her father pushes her to date the sleazy boy in her class that reeked of a cocky attitude and patronized those who he deemed lower than himself (which meant everyone), Hyunjin places her pride elsewhere and accepts the boy’s half-cocked attempt at asking her out.

 

(Hyunjin had higher standards than this pig of a human being. She might be cold and lofty, but, she knew how to respect a majority of society. Or at least fake it. And being with him, Hyunjin hates every bit of it. The boy is self-centered and far too self-infatuated to think about anything but himself.

 

Her father’s business might have gained a possible branch to operate from with their new relationship, but, Hyunjin doesn’t think it’s worth listening to the boy brag about his gains and Yeezy’s. There’s more to talk about than muscles and trashy overpriced shoes.)

 

~

 

Hyunjin knows her boyfriend is cheating on her. She couldn’t care less. He didn’t give a shit about her, she didn’t have the same effort for him. If there was one thing they could mutually agree on, it was that their relationship works because of the beautiful orchestration their parents composed.

 

When he tries to kiss her on one of their dates, Hyunjin tilts her head and leans away. He could waste her time, make her bored enough to consider drilling through her skull to pass the time, and disgust her with his uncleanly habits, but, he is not allowed to take her first kiss.

 

(The thought comes from the romantic part of Hyunjin that she shuts away deep into the darkness. Romanticism is paired with love, and with love, vulnerability comes. She learned that from her father. And through him, he taught her that vulnerability is weakness.

 

Being weak and being Kim Hyunjin is not a thing that exists in her dictionary.)

 

“You are not allowed to kiss me.”

 

The boy groans and rolls his eyes, “Are you kidding? We’ve been on like five dates and I’ve barely even held your hand. If you were any other girl, you’d be in my bed begging for me.”

 

It takes everything in Hyunjin not to gag. She thanks her father for teaching her how to keep a poker face no matter the situation.

 

“I’m not any other girl, asshole. I knew you were dumb, but, I didn’t think you’d be so fucked to think that I was that easy. I pity the girls that get in bed with you.”

 

(Not that there was anything wrong with being easy, Hyunjin thinks. It’s just, being easy for this pig of a human is a waste of time.)

 

She gestures at his whole body and grimaces before throwing the napkin in her lap on the table, “Everything about you screams overcompensation for what you’ve got in your pants.”

 

Before leaving, Hyunjin takes a breadstick, “Also, if you couldn’t get it through your thick ass head, we’re over. And you’re paying for dinner. Hope I never see you again—you disgust me.”

 

When Hyunjin calls her personal driver to take her home, her father already knows how Hyunjin’s evening went.

 

“Why’d you break up with him, Hyunjin? He and his father are an excellent venture for us to expand with.”

 

Hyunjin scoffs before fixing herself a bowl of cereal, “He’s a tool and completely useless. He wouldn’t know what to do with an investor even if he had someone guiding him through it. Trust me on this, father. There’s better people to work with.”

 

(With respect came trust. So, he lets Hyunjin win this one.

 

It’s not often that he does, but, he knew Hyunjin knew well enough what people would be more beneficial than others and if she knew that the boy wouldn’t be an asset to their business, he simply would not be.)

 

~.~.~

 

It’s not often Hyunjin suggests things to her father. She knows he is too stubborn and too self-righteous to actually consider her opinions and thoughts. Hyunjin usually settles on drafting her ideas by herself in her notebook and imagining the benefits and consequences that could come from them.

 

But, when she is at a party keeping a watchful eye on a table full of drinks, she catches a girl dropping a white pill into a drink. Instead of leaving to wait for someone to take the drink and get drugged up, the girl pulls out something that looks a lot like a juul. Instead of smoking from it like one usually does with juuls, she dips it into the drink. Hyunjin feels her eyebrows furrow—technology and liquid was never the perfect pair. Was this girl so far gone to actually do something so stupid? A quick moment later, the girl does a dance that Hyunjin thinks means victory. Following the girl who quickly leaves, Hyunjin watches as she dumps the drink into the kitchen sink.

 

“You wasted a couple of bucks there. Not just in alcohol, but, in rohypnol.”

 

The girl startles and she puts a hand over her heart to ease the rapid beating that came with being surprised.

 

“I wasn’t planning on actually hurting someone! I just wanted to try something out!”

 

Hyunjin raises an eyebrow. There is never a good reason to be drugging a drink at a college party.

 

The girl takes the juul out of her pocket and waves it around, “Look, I’m testing this out. It looks like a juul, but, really, it gages if there’s anything sketchy in drinks. I made it because my girlfriend almost got drugged up in our freshman year and I wanted to make something that is inconspicuous and consistent in performance to prevent things like that from happening.”

 

“You invented that?”

 

The girl frantically nods, “I would never think about assaulting someone like that! Frankly, I shouldn’t have to be inventing something like this because we should be teaching people not to fucking rape, but, we’ve got to move with the times.”

 

And the checklist in Hyunjin’s mind gets fulfilled—the girl’s invention is innovative, current, useful, and portable. In the girl’s hands, Hyunjin sees a product to invest on.

 

“What’s your name?”

 

The girl stutters.

 

“I’m- I’m not in trouble, right? I swear I don’t do things like this normally. I mean, I have been to check how consistently this thing works, but I promise the drinks go straight in the drain after! I’m not- I wouldn’t-”

 

“Don’t forget to breathe. You’re not in trouble. I want to invest in you. I have the means, for the most part. I just need your name and a proper introduction to what that thing in your hand is and I could have that product being made by the thousands daily.”

 

The girl freezes and tilts her head. She never thought about mass selling the drug tester in her hand for profit. All she wanted to do was protect her loved ones. But, she isn’t above others having the means for more safety precautions. The girl pockets the invention in her pocket before reaching her right hand out.

 

“I’m Kim Jiwoo.”

 

Hyunjin shakes her hand and the girl’s firm handshake is something her father would be proud of.

 

“Kim Hyunjin. I hope I can look forward to working with you.”

 

Before Hyunjin leaves after handing her business card to her, she hears Jiwoo stammer behind her.

 

“Wait. Kim Hyunjin. Kim Industries Kim Hyunjin?”

 

Hyunjin looks behind her and smirks, confident and satisfied with the power that courses through her veins, “You’re a smart girl, you can figure that one out.”

 

Before Hyunjin leaves the kitchen and goes back to the loud living room, she hears Jiwoo behind her.

 

“Holy shit! Jungeun’s never gonna believe this.”

 

(When Jiwoo tells her later on, Jungeun boasts, “If it weren’t for me almost being in danger, you wouldn’t have Kim fucking Hyunjin’s business card in your wallet.”

 

Jiwoo smacks her shoulder because that party had been a nightmare for her. Her girlfriend, as lovely and incredible she is, could be an absolute ass sometimes.

 

Jungeun knows what she has to do to get back on Jiwoo’s good side. It involves a lot of kisses, a tub of neapolitan ice cream, and a whole lot of pouting and begging.

 

Jiwoo crumbles the second Jungeun peppers kisses all over her face, her lips sticky from ice cream. When Jiwoo washes her face later on in the night, she is sure to stick her cold hands on Jungeun’s warm stomach and laughs at how the girl squirms away from the sudden freezing sensation on her belly.)

 

~

 

“Father! Her invention is genius! It’s innovative and new and unique! There’s not a single thing like that in the market. There’s strips and testers, but, they’re not as clever as hers is.”

 

“Kim Hyunjin! Do not raise your voice with me. This piece of machine is not worth my time or investment. And that’s final.”

 

Hyunjin knew persistence, she learned it from the man himself.

 

“Take a chance on this! Just trust me! I _know_ this will do well! Just sponsor enough money for us to make a couple of prototypes and it will take off!”

 

Her father is cold and calculated, cool and distant. His words are pointed and sharp, “Last time I checked, I have the control and the upper hand when it comes to making decisions and executive plans. You, however, have no right to be telling me what to do. Know your place, Hyunjin. Your assertion of power is pitiful.”

 

For once, Hyunjin lets her frustrations win over her. She could deal with her father bossing her around, pushing her to date shitty men, deciding every single opportunity for her, but, she could only do so much. Taking her jacket and her car keys, Hyunjin makes her way out, needing time away from him.

 

“Don’t forget that when you grow old and senile and useless, _I’m_ the one taking over the business. It’s written in the contract and in your will. Don’t set yourself up for failure, father. Know when to step down and give me control because one day, I _will_ be the one to have it. If I’m your investment, treat me like one.”

 

(A power-hungry man and his hubris is his vulnerability, Hyunjin knows this.

 

Her father trained her too well. She could be as ruthless and cold as he could—living with him and not knowing what love felt like could do that to her. That man had fallen in love and gotten himself hurt. He has his own sensitivity and weakness to fall into. Hyunjin barely had any experiences with love, didn’t have something tethering her humanity to lawfulness. All she knew was human capital and entertaining those who could only benefit her.)

 

~~(In truth, it’s tragic how her father has plucked genuine love from her.)~~

 

Driving to a place familiar to her, Hyunjin pulls up at the cemetery twenty minutes away from her house. Hyunjin’s mother had only been a part of her life for two years before falling ill and passing away. Hyunjin thinks that maybe she might have felt love from her parents when her mother was still living. But, at the consequence of her mother leaving, so did her father’s affection.

 

All Hyunjin knows now is being cold and callused. She knows how to succeed, but, doesn’t know how to love without expecting compensation.

 

Walking to her mother’s grave, Hyunjin sits at the front of the grave and reads the lettering on her mother’s tombstone.

 

_Gone too soon._

 

Gone way too fucking soon, Hyunjin thinks.

 

(If there was one thing Hyunjin wanted most, it was to know what her father was like when he was happy. Perhaps, she would know what being in love looks like on him, would know what it feels like to have a father’s genuine care and affection.)

 

It’s peaceful at the cemetery—the dead get the rest they deserve there. It’s silent and mostly lonely there with a scattered presence of individuals putting flowers by their loved one’s grave. Hyunjin doesn’t say anything and looks at the picture of her mother smiling and lets the peaceful air around her calm her down.

 

It’s just Hyunjin at the part of the cemetery she is at. That is until a flash of black catches her eyes. Looking to her right, a girl is bent over someone’s grave and taking the flowers from it. Hyunjin hears her apologize before walking away and doing the same thing to another grave. When the girl walks past her, Hyunjin watches as she takes another bundle of flowers in her hand from the grave in front of her mother’s.

 

Feeling eyes on her, the girl looks behind her to catch Hyunjin’s eyes.

 

“What’re you looking at?”

 

Hyunjin shrugs and she is more nonchalant than she is curious about the girl’s action.

 

“Oh, just, some girl stealing flowers from dead people. Nothing new.”

 

Something about the casual tone in Hyunjin’s voice makes the girl relax.

 

“Not even gonna ask why?”

 

Hyunjin hums and shakes her head, “Nah. Couldn’t care to ask. They’re all dead anyway. A couple of missing flowers isn’t going to bother them.”

 

The girl quirks her eyebrows. It’s not often she’s met with such indifference. She has been scolded, yelled and cursed at, and even chased. But, with this girl, it seemed like she barely even lifted an eyebrow.

 

It’s odd how the girl simply does not care.

 

Either way, it makes her day easier. It’s nice to not hear people yell at her. Even more nice not having to run away from people shaking their fist at her.

 

“Well, I guess I’ll just be on my way then.”

 

“Have fun with that, Flower Thief.”

 

The girl smiles, clicks her mouth, and shoots a finger gun towards Hyunjin, “Sure will, Cemetery Girl.”

 

Watching the girl walk away, Hyunjin feels more at peace than normal.

 

_Odd._

 

When Hyunjin drives home, she ignores the part of her that tries to reimagine the girl’s face.

 

Hyunjin isn’t blind. Flower Thief is more than just cute. Honestly, she is perhaps the most beautiful person she has ever seen, but, she would rather leave it at that. This would probably be the last of Flower Thief and it isn’t worth her time to dwell on the girl, no matter how charming and bright her smile was.

 

(A part of Hyunjin wishes to see her again.)

 

Arriving home, her father is sitting at the dining table, a glass of whiskey on the table and his evening glasses sitting on his nose. (The ring of water around the glass tells Hyunjin he has been nursing the drink for a while.)

 

Silently, he gives her a contract and a note on top of it with a number carrying a decent amount of zero’s to kickstart Jiwoo’s idea.

 

Hyunjin wins the battle once again.

 

She’ll be sure to win the war.

 

Even if it’s against the man who taught her how to fight, she won’t be the one waving a white flag.

 

Vulnerability is weakness and there’s nothing to be vulnerable over if there isn’t a weakness to exploit.

 

~

 

When Hyunjin contacts Jiwoo on the phone, the exchange on the latter’s part is unintentionally informal.

 

“Who’s this? I don’t appreciate people calling my girlfriend during our date night.”

 

“It’s Kim Hyunjin, but, if I’m interrupting something, I can always call later.”

 

In the receiver, she hears a gasp and the girl’s voice is harder to hear, presumably because she takes the phone away from her mouth. Still, Hyunjin hears her, “Oh shit. Jiwoo, it’s Kim Hyunjin.”

 

Hyunjin hears a slight scuffle and a quiet squabble that abruptly gets caught off.

 

“Hi Hyunjin! Sorry about that. Jungeun’s just ridiculous like that sometimes. Don’t mind her. In fact, pretend our conversation starts right now. What’s on your mind?”

 

Something about Jiwoo (and Jungeun) makes her laugh. Not vindictively or cruelly—it’s genuine and kind-hearted.

 

“I’ve got the funds to get you started, Jiwoo. What’s a good time for us to meet and properly discuss this little invention of yours?”

 

Hyunjin hears a gasp on the other line and something that sounds a lot like contained screaming from disbelief.

 

“Oh my God, are- are you serious?”

 

“I wouldn’t waste my time pranking you, Jiwoo. I’m as serious as I ever could be.”

 

“Holy shit! Wait. Excuse my language, I’m sorry—it’s so unprofessional of me to curse in front of you; I promise I don’t normally cuss like-”

 

Before the girl spirals into a mess of rambles and apologies, Hyunjin cuts her off. (Oddly, she isn’t annoyed or frustrated at the girl’s chaotic tendencies—Hyunjin is rather bemused.)

 

“Jiwoo, you could say every bad word under the sun and I wouldn’t care so long as it’s not directed towards me. Just tell me, when are you available?”

 

At the end of a fifteen conversation that should have only taken five minutes at most, Hyunjin schedules a meeting with Jiwoo at the coffee shop two minutes away from their college on a Thursday afternoon after Jiwoo’s class.

 

(It’s the first time Hyunjin feels like she is truly in control of her life. It’s the first time she gets to go with her gut and follow through with who and what she believes in.

 

Jiwoo means more to her than she would care to admit.)

 

~.~.~

 

Waiting for Jiwoo at the cafe, Hyunjin is there an hour early after her class ended to prepare for her debrief with the girl. It’s peaceful—there is a mild chatter around her, but, Hyunjin doesn’t mind it. (She has always liked white noise anyway; it made her feel a little less alone). The sweet smell of coffee beans waft through the air and it’s a scent that she basks in. Her peace of mind is disrupted when a smack against the glass window beside her startles her. Shocked, Hyunjin looks outside to see a girl bracing herself against the window. The girl bends down to pick up a longboard and when the girl outside looks inside the shop, her eyes widen too.

 

Not just because she nearly longboarded into a window because she was too preoccupied with Snapchatting the dog across the street from her and disturbing a patron in the coffee shop but also because she recognized the face looking back at her.

 

It shocks Hyunjin too.

 

In what world would Flower Thief be right outside of her window with an embarrassed smile on her face?

 

The girl starts mouthing words at Hyunjin, but, she has always been bad at lip reading. Moving her ear closer to the window, as if that would help her see what the other girl was saying, she fails to understand what she is saying. Suddenly, Flower Thief abandons the window she is at and makes her way into the coffee shop. Hyunjin’s eyes trail after her movements and when she comes inside, she makes an immediate beeline towards the Business major.

 

When the girl stops at Hyunjin’s table, she casually slides into the seat across from her and rests her chin in her hands.

 

“Just wanted to say sorry.”

 

“For what?”

 

“Looked like I scared you. And I don’t like being scared so I wanted to apologize in case you don’t like being scared either.”

 

Hyunjin furrows her eyebrows, “You came all of the way in here just to say sorry?”

 

The girl leans back into her seat and closes her eyes to take a deep whiff of the coffee-scented air.

 

“Yup!”

 

Getting out of the seat and picking up her longboard, the girl waves behind her before leaving, “See you some other time, Cemetery Girl. Grey looks great on you, by the way!”

 

(It confuses Hyunjin how Flower Thief makes her feel so at ease. There’s something about her that makes Hyunjin forget about how shitty and cutthroat the world is.)

 

(It’s alarming how disarming she is.)

 

As the hour ticks away, Jiwoo runs in two minutes early, panting and her bangs in a disarray.

 

She looks disorganized and mussed up, but, Hyunjin appreciates her effort in being prompt.

 

Jiwoo might be chaotic, but, at least she had the decency to be respectful—Hyunjin is more than capable of paying the respect back.

 

The girl adjusts her hair and tries to calm to her breathing, “I’m not late, am I?”

 

Hyunjin feels her the corner of her lips tug up. With someone as wholesome and genuine as Jiwoo, how could she not take a liking to her?

 

“You’re right on time, Jiwoo. Let’s get you a drink and we can start.”

 

While nursing a black coffee (Hyunjin) and a caramel frap drowning in sugar (Jiwoo), the two establish a procedural guide on producing the girl’s invention.

 

(After signing the appropriate contracts, Jiwoo is more ecstatic in brainstorming names than she is about the financial aspects of the drug-testing looking juul.

 

_“I think we should call it a Chuul!”_

 

_“A Chuul? Why?”_

 

_The girl beams her boxy smile and Hyunjin is already considering the name despite finding it ridiculous._

 

_“Just because!”_

 

_“Just because?”_

 

 _Jiwoo nods her head rapidly. Hyunjin sighs and writes the name down, “Chuul it is then.”_ )

 

When their meeting ends, Jiwoo pulls Hyunjin into a hug and it’s the first hug Hyunjin receives in an awfully long time.

 

(Hyunjin doesn’t hate it. In fact, she likes it. She’d never admit it though.)

 

~

 

Hyunjin never really believed in destiny, but, a part of her starts considering the coincidences occurring in her life when she sees Flower Thief the next day.

 

After studying for her economics exam, Hyunjin leaves the library to head home. Her walk isn’t alone, however. Behind her, someone calls for her, “Hey Cemetery Girl!”

 

There was only person who called her that and she freezes when she hears Flower Thief’s voice. Looking at her, the girl has a lollipop in her mouth and her longboard in her hand.

 

“Random question, but, do you ever smile?”

 

Hyunjin looks at the girl beside her quizzically. “What?”

 

“I’ve been watching you and I don’t think I’ve ever seen you smile.”

 

“You- you’ve been watching me?”

 

Flower Thief raises her hands in defense, “Only just today and in a completely non-stalkerish way! You’re really pretty and interest me! So, do you? I think the most emotion I’ve ever seen from you is confusion.”

 

Hyunjin stammers, caught off guard by the odd question and stuck on the breezy compliment the girl gave, “I mean, yeah, I smile. I smiled yesterday at the coffee shop.”

 

Flower Thief’s jaw drops, “Only yesterday? You mean you didn’t smile at all today?”

 

Hyunjin takes a moment to recall her day, “Nope; not to my recollection.”

 

Hyunjin watches as the girl beside her has a mental warfare.

 

“Don’t take this the wrong way, Cemetery Girl, but, what the fuck? How could life disappoint you so much in one day that you _don’t_ smile?”

 

Hyunjin shrugs, “Guess there’s not much for me to smile about.”

 

The other girl stops and balks. “There’s plenty of things to smile about! I’ll show you. Maybe not today, but, someday, I’ll find something that’s gonna make you smile.”

 

When Flower Thief starts departing from her, she lifts her pinky, “I promise, Cemetery Girl, there’s reasons to smile!”

 

Hyunjin watches as the girl shakes her pinky in emphasis and points at her hand with it.

 

Hyunjin thinks, “Oh. She wants me to promise too.” When Hyunjin raises her pinky, she feels ridiculous, but, she doesn’t have it in her to care.

 

Seeing the other girl’s pinky finally coming up, the girl with the lollipop is content with the promise made and starts picking up her pace to get a start on her longboard.

 

“I’ll catch you later, Cemetery Girl!”

 

As she parts, Hyunjin yells behind her, “My name’s Hyunjin!”

 

Hyunjin barely hears the other girl’s reply back, her body’s orientation away from her, “I know!”

 

Hyunjin furrows her eyebrows.

 

If she knew then why did she keep calling her Cemetery Girl?

 

And what the hell is her name? Frankly, it’s exhausting referring to her as Flower Thief. Hyunjin tires of not having a name for the girl that keeps running through her mind.

 

This time around, her mind doesn’t need to reimagine the girl’s face like it had to the first time she met her. Yesterday at the coffee shop, she felt her eyes tracing the girl’s face in an attempt to remember her sharp features. Today, looking at her, Hyunjin tries to remember the beauty marks by the girl’s eye and cheek.

 

The more the girl comes into her life, the more Hyunjin wants to dwell on thinking about her. This is unlike anything Hyunjin has ever experienced. But, she thinks she likes it.

 

(When Hyunjin doesn’t have to feel like there’s a battle for power, she already feels more at peace.

 

For someone that Hyunjin has only spent a slight moment of time with, it’s remarkable how free the girl makes her feel.)

 

Watching her longboarding not too far away from her, Hyunjin observes as the girl halts to a sudden stop at a staircase, her hands coming down at the rails to stop her from toppling over and eating cement.

 

Clumsy and odd, Hyunjin feels her lips tugging up into a smile.

 

Flower Thief doesn’t have to look far if she needs to find reasons to make Hyunjin smile. Her goofy smile and whimsical tendencies are enough, but, Hyunjin thinks it’ll be entertaining to see what the girl has in store for her.

 

~

 

Hyunjin doesn’t see Flower Thief until two weeks later.

 

The weather is fair and perfect—the sun is out, but, it is cloudy enough that its rays don’t beat down on her. She was working with Jiwoo outside, testing the Chuul out with a variety of other drugs. So far, it has a perfect track record, lighting up each time it is placed in a laced drink and staying unlit when it is placed in their control variable.

 

Today, Jungeun had asked to tag along to see the progress the two have made and if Jiwoo was chaos, Jungeun was mayhem. Absentmindedly, Jungeun has mistaken her water for laced up drinks more times than she should and if it weren’t for the labels placed on the cups and Jiwoo smacking her hand when she grasps the cups, Jungeun would be passed out on the courtyard table.

 

“Jungeun, I don’t get it. Your water bottle, first of all, is steel, second of all, has a cap on it, and last of all, it’s right next to you. Why do you keep going for the cup that’s going to knock you out?”

 

Jungeun whines and petulantly tries to excuse herself.

 

Her excuses don’t amount to much. Childishly, the girl pouts and crosses her arms, “Fine! I’ll just hang out with Heekkie then!”

 

When Jiwoo kisses her goodbye, she tugs at the girl’s shirt before letting her go, “Please don’t try doing parkour again. I don’t need the both of you coming to me with broken arms again.”

 

“That was one time!”

 

“One time enough, Moomin! Just please, don’t do anything that will make me cry.”

 

Jungeun kisses her once more before smiling adoringly at her, “I’ll do my best, Jiwooming. I’ll see you later for dinner.”

 

Waving goodbye, Hyunjin watches as Jiwoo’s eyes follow her girlfriend. Hyunjin doesn’t know what love is, but, she has a feeling it looks a lot like Jiwoo and Jungeun together.

 

“You really love her, don’t you?”

 

Jiwoo’s big and innocent eyes pop up. Hyunjin rarely talks about things outside of business—it’s odd for her to ask a question so personal. Jiwoo welcomes it, thinks that this could be a chance for her to open the other girl up more.

 

“Endlessly. Jungeun and I, no matter the universe that fate puts us in, no matter the people that we are and where we are, I think we’re meant to find each other. We get each other. Being with her, it feels like everything fell into place for us.”

 

“And she makes you happy?”

 

“More than words could ever describe.”

 

Hyunjin nods and drops her eyes, focusing back on the Chuul, “Good.”

 

It’s not much, but, Jiwoo sees a flash of longing in Hyunjin’s eyes. It’s not the kind that is jealous, it’s more like the kind that is melancholy.

 

(Jiwoo is only beginning to understand how lonely Hyunjin feels.

 

Being surrounded by a greedy man and being forced into a world so vindictive and cold cannot foster a home of comfort and love.

 

Hyunjin wishes she had felt something like that to ache for, but instead, all she has is the burning drive to succeed and triumph.

 

Winning isn’t everything, but, to her, it’s all she has.)

 

After working on the Chuul for an hour more, Jiwoo invites Hyunjin to dinner.

 

“Our friend Heejin is gonna be there and she’ll be bouncing all over the place. She whines about third-wheeling all of the time. But honestly, it’s her fault for being friends with a couple and being too shy to get a girlfriend.”

 

Hyunjin would usually refuse such an offer, but, Jiwoo smiles at her and Hyunjin gets why Jungeun lets her get away with so many things.

 

It’s hard to say no to a smile so genuine and happy.

 

~

 

Arriving to Jiwoo’s apartment, the first thing Hyunjin hears is yelling.

 

“Heejin, the rice is burning! Get the rice! Get the rice!”

 

Hyunjin didn’t think it was possible for one to burn rice. But, seeing the absolute mess that Jungeun is, and God forbid this Heejin, Hyunjin thinks that they might be able to do the impossible.

 

Hyunjin knows that much like misery, mayhem likes company.

 

Walking in, Jiwoo leans over the couch to kiss a dark-haired girl on the cheek before kissing Jungeun’s as well. (She’d normally go for the lips, but, the girl was dialed in on the screen and Jiwoo wasn’t up for hearing Jungeun screaming into her ear about messing her up.) When Hyunjin steps further in, she sees that Jungeun and Heejin are zeroed in on the screen, screaming at each other.

 

On the screen, two critters are running about, cutting fish and vegetables, and serving dishes to a conveyor belt.

 

“Just fuckin’ yeet the cucumber over—we don’t give a damn about sanitation in this restaurant!”

 

Hyunjin knows that voice.

 

_Flower Thief._

 

Hyunjin thinks that fate is deciding to play its hand in her life.

 

Her thoughts are interrupted by Jungeun’s screeching, “I need plates! Heejin, wash the fucking plates!”

 

Hyunjin watches as a raccoon in a wheelchair rushes over to a sink to wash dishes, “Don’t tell me what to do, Jungeun!”

 

Hyunjin thinks one of her greatest achievements of the day is finally learning Flower Thief’s name.

 

Heejin.

 

(Hyunjin chooses to ignore the butterflies that flutter about when she thinks about her name. A name shouldn’t be enough to make her nervous, but, it does, and Hyunjin loathes how weak it makes her feel.)

 

Hyunjin just leans against the wall and watches as the two girls finish the level with three stars and moves a caravan further to the harder stages. This time, the critters are making burgers and there is a noticeable increase in difficulty. And screaming. So much screaming.

 

“The meat is burning! The meat is burning!”

 

“Get the meat, Jungeun!”

 

Jiwoo’s voice joins in with the loud clamor, “Holy shit your kitchen’s on fire!”

 

“Where’s the fire extinguisher? Holy fuck!”

 

Hyunjin watches as the raccoon grabs the fire extinguisher, but, gets stuck outside of the kitchen, circling in panic and stress.

 

“It won’t let me in! Let me in! I have a kitchen to extinguish! Our meats! Our lettuce! They’re burning!”

 

It’s physically impossible for Hyunjin to prevent the laughter spilling out of her.

 

Hearing a laugh that is not familiar to Jiwoo’s or Jungeun’s, Heejin stops her character from circling around and looks behind her.

 

“Hyunjin?”

 

(Heejin is sure to note how Hyunjin’s laugh is the brightest and most cheerful sound in the world.)

 

“Hi, Flower Thief.”

 

(Hyunjin is smiling when she greets her and it takes everything in Heejin to _not_ swoon. Internally, however, that’s a different story.)

 

Jungeun butts in, “Wait. Heejin were you stealing flowers from defenseless dead people again?”

 

Heejin buffers and Hyunjin can barely see how her cheeks flame up, “Maybe.”

 

“Heekkie, if you need flowers, just buy them. Or pick the ones at the library.”

 

“But, my dad likes daffodils and the library doesn’t grow daffodils.”

 

“Heejin, you act like you don’t have money.”

 

“Yeah! I don’t! I survive on cheap instant noodles! What do you want me to do? Starve?”

 

Jungeun rebuttals, glaring at Heejin, “Maybe I do!”

 

If Jungeun and Jiwoo were chaotic, so was Heejin and it shows when she gets Jungeun in a headlock.

 

“Say that again, Jungeun! Say that again!”

 

Jungeun’s voice is strained and muffled under Heejin’s duress.

 

“Deserve!”

 

Hyunjin only watches in awe at how the two wrestle about on the floor and how Jiwoo just laughs to herself on the couch and does nothing to stop them.

 

(If Jiwoo joined them on their wrestling, there’s no doubt she could have both of them in submission at the drop of a dime. She worked hard to get the third-degree black belt that she has and she is unafraid of using her knowledge and expertise, whether or not if her best friend and girlfriend were involved.)

 

Hyunjin doesn’t know what kind of dinner invite she accepted, but, it certainly beats the ones her father forces her to go to—those ones are overwhelmingly uneventful and mind-numbingly boring. She only barely took her shoes off and her evening has already turned out to be interesting and engaging.

 

Watching the three of them, even with Jungeun and Heejin’s playful bantering, Hyunjin thinks that this must be what it feels like to have companionship and friends that carry the purest of intentions for each other—there’s no materialistic or financial gain, no human capital, just comfort and warmth and genuine affection.

 

(It’d be a lie if Hyunjin said she didn’t want it or that she wasn’t jealous. The girl finds her weakness a little too late. Her loneliness and desperate ache for her heart to have company is her vulnerability. Being around Jiwoo and seeing how selflessly she loves, Hyunjin realizes she catalyzed her own downfall.

 

Hyunjin is sure to keep that part of her hidden away. If her father knew, he would exploit her desperation faster than he could sign a check.

 

If she was going to win the war, she needs to keep her emotions in check.

 

But, Heejin smiles at her from across the table and Hyunjin can’t help but to like how the corner of her eyes crinkle and to notice how the right corner of her lips turn up before the rest of her smile adorns her face.

 

Hyunjin supposes that she could surrender her defenses if the three girls are around her.

 

With Heejin trying her hardest to make Hyunjin smile throughout the night (it included going cross-eyed as she ate, making dumb jokes at the dinner table, and putting her chopsticks in her mouth to mimic walruses), there’s no way she couldn’t let her walls down around her.

 

For practically being a stranger, Heejin showed more care for her than her father ever did.)

 

(Hyunjin thinks that being cared for is a greater feeling than winning.

 

But, then again, triumphing over the man that has only made her feel inferior for her whole entire life would be a pretty damn satisfying feeling.)

 

If Hyunjin could create her own sense of family at the same place where she curates the home for her ideas and beliefs as a businesswoman, Hyunjin will be sure to protect them with her life.

 

Maybe there’s more things to fight for than just success and winning, more things to invest on than just products and money.

 

On this night, Hyunjin promises to fight for something that her heart feels is right. With Jiwoo and the Chuul, she is determined to see the other girl’s success and happiness. That will be her victory.

 

Her father losing control and respecting her power more are but the grand cherries on top.

 

~

 

Hyunjin hit the jackpot with Jiwoo. Not only is her invention clever, but, Jiwoo is also well-loved on campus. So, when she starts telling people about the Chuul after their testing, the two can commence beta testing the technology. In a decently sized study, Hyunjin has organized for several groups of people to use the Chuul during parties and to report back after a month of using it.

 

When the month passes by and Hyunjin and Jiwoo analyze the reports back, they only find minor complaints with the Chuul. Overwhelmingly, the response is good and positive.

 

_Lost it after the second week, but, it worked fine when I knew where it was._

 

_My boyfriend tried to smoke out of it and got disappointed that nothing came of it._

 

_Accidentally dropped it in jungle juice, but, it still worked fine._

 

_Went to a party, it didn’t light up and I got home safe. So I guess it worked._

 

_Too pink, but, it worked._

 

With the positive response, Hyunjin is confident at bringing this idea up with investors.

 

“Jiwoo, would you like to come with me when I appeal for the Chuul?”

 

“You want me to come?”

 

Hyunjin smiles and nods firmly.

 

“Of course, I want you to come. You came up with this idea; it’s only fair that you participate in all of the steps it takes for you to get it out there.”

 

Jiwoo is a beaming light of excitement and happiness when she hugs Hyunjin and sways them around. Their swaying pauses when Jiwoo remembers something, “Wait. I don’t have fancy clothes.”

 

Hyunjin laughs and squeezes a bit tighter to Jiwoo, “Don’t worry about that, Jiwoo. I have plenty and if not, it’s not going to hurt me if we buy you some.”

 

Jiwoo stubbornly protests against Hyunjin spending money on her and it’s endearing how adamant she is about it. When Jiwoo comes to Hyunjin’s house to look through her clothes, her jaw drops open.

 

She’s seen big houses before, but, she’s never _been_ in one.

 

It’s mind blowing how many of her rooms could fit in the one expanse of Hyunjin’s kitchen.

 

When Jiwoo comes home, she has a silk blouse, a ribbon, and a skirt that costs more than two paychecks combined to wear for her future meeting with Hyunjin and investors.

 

The day of the meeting, Hyunjin is the least bit nervous, primed and prepared for it due to her past experience with talking to these men.

 

(Her father might be an insensitive asshole, but, at least he’s an insensitive asshole who taught her well.)

 

Jiwoo, on the other hand, fears about sweating bullets. Adult meetings and serious conversations aren’t her forte. For God’s sake, she talks about things like how odd it’d be for palm leaves to have fingers and for hands to have leaves as fingers on the daily with Jungeun. Being with important people like investors and taking forward charge of her future is something that is incredibly foreign to her.

 

Hyunjin seems to read her well because she stops before opening the door to the building where the meeting is taking place. Taking the briefcase that is in Jiwoo’s hand and placing it on the floor, Hyunjin places her hands on her shoulders and lowers her head to catch her eyes.

 

“It’ll be okay, Jiwoo. Just stay by me and follow my lead. And if you feel really anxious, don’t say anything. These guys are vultures and they’re going to look for any loopholes or cracks in our product or in you. The Chuul has proven to be reliable and your intentions are good. Let me handle the business and the stuck-up men. I’ve been dealing with people like them my whole life and I know how to get through to them. You’re in good hands, Jiwoo. Trust me.”

 

Taking a breath of courage, Jiwoo clenches her jaw and nods in motivation, “I trust you, Hyunjin. We’re gonna get through this.”

 

Smiling at how quickly and easily Jiwoo places her trust in her, Hyunjin relishes in the feeling of being reliable and believed in.

 

Her father never gave her his full trust.

 

Hyunjin promises to pull through—she won’t let Jiwoo down.

 

Not for the satisfaction of proving her father wrong, but, to protect her through it all. She owes her that much.

 

Taking the briefcase and handing it back to Jiwoo, Hyunjin opens the door for her.

 

It’s a door of opportunity and they’re going to grasp at it with all that they’ve got.

 

~  
  
The meeting goes as smoothly as it could. Hyunjin answers most of the question and it’s the first time Jiwoo sees Hyunjin in her element—she’s professional, confident, and persuasive. There is no doubt that Hyunjin has merit in what she does. The investors ask Jiwoo some questions and she gets through them, looking to Hyunjin whenever she feels her heart walking up her throat. The girl’s eyes are calm and reassuring and it eases her nerves.

 

At the end of it while Jiwoo waits by the door for Hyunjin to come back after talking to an investor, the sight of her friend coming closer to her makes her nervous. The Chuul had unexpectedly become a large part of her focus and attention. The effort that she put in it before is maximized to something she never predicted.

 

Jiwoo expects bad news until Hyunjin’s smile shows through and it’s bright and beaming and it’s enough for Jiwoo to know they’re more than just okay.

 

“We got someone to invest, Jiwoo! Mr. Ha was interested in your product and he wants to meet more with us to figure things out!”

 

When the two come back to Jiwoo’s apartment, Jungeun and Heejin are there with party horns in their mouths.

 

“We got it!”

 

At the news, the two pop the small confetti barrels in their hands and blow into the horns.

 

For the first time, Hyunjin feels celebrated for her triumphs—it beats the feeling of winning by a long run. Jiwoo kisses her cheek and when she gets dragged into playing Overcooked 2, Hyunjin feels like she might have found people she could call her friends.

 

~

 

Spending time with Jiwoo outside of their Chuul business meant spending time with Jungeun and Heejin.

 

Which really meant hanging out with Heejin because Jungeun and Jiwoo too quickly get wrapped up in their own bubble of affection. (Hyunjin doesn’t know how Heejin lasted so long third-wheeling.)

 

Being with Heejin is a breath of fresh air.

 

She’s kooky and eccentric and likes going out of her way to make Hyunjin laugh and it’s enough to get her heart all messed up for her. Hyunjin likes Heejin in a different way than she likes Jiwoo and Jungeun. Sure, she wants to spend her time with them and share good news and the mundane things she does in her day with them, but, certainly, she doesn’t want to kiss them.

 

Heejin is the first person Hyunjin likes in her life and Hyunjin thinks that there couldn’t be a person greater to like.

 

If Heejin could make her feel like gold even after her father dismissed her success after she told him about getting an investor for the Chuul, there isn’t much that girl _couldn’t_ do for Hyunjin.

 

For the first time, Hyunjin isn’t focused on what monetary values she could gain by being around Heejin. She isn’t focused on how her heart lowers its defenses for her, doesn’t think about power plays or manipulating her to make Heejin become inferior. Being with her, Hyunjin can only think of wanting to make her laugh or how pretty she looks under the sun at golden hour. Being with Heejin, Hyunjin feels like she can let go of her defenses and pretend that she isn’t a girl too caught up on success and winning some strung out war with her loveless father.

 

When the two start hanging out alone, it starts with Heejin trying to teach Hyunjin how to longboard.

 

Usually, Hyunjin likes to get on the longboard and hold onto Heejin’s shoulder while she walked so that she could move along with her. Finally deciding to teach her, Hyunjin’s legs are slightly trembling and her hands clutch at Heejin’s when she puts a foot on the board and rocks it back and forth.

 

“So, all you have to do is kick off with the foot at the back of the board. Start slow and gentle so that you don’t lose control.”

 

“What do you mean _all_ I have to do is kick off? You say that so easily, as if my knees aren’t about to collapse!”

 

Heejin laughs and holds the hand in hers tighter, “Just breathe a bit to calm down. And plus, if you fall, I’ve got you. Trust me, Hyunjin, you’ll be okay.”

 

(It’s alarming how easily Hyunjin’s heart finds comfort in Heejin’s words. Hyunjin thinks that she’d put her life in Heejin’s hands with the utmost confidence.

 

It terrifies her how she comes to trust her so wholeheartedly.)

 

Starting slow, Heejin picks up her walking pace to match Hyunjin’s. Now having to jog to keep up, Heejin watches how the girl’s face lights up and how her smile creeps onto her face. Getting caught up in Hyunjin, it startles her when the girl starts panicking and losing control of the board.

 

“How do I turn? How do I turn?”

 

Quickly, Heejin looks out for the curve coming up and grasps Hyunjin’s hands even tighter to rein her control back, “Lean where you wanna turn. Just don’t-”

 

Hyunjin leans too much into Heejin and the turn is too sudden for her to keep her footing on the board.

 

But, just as Heejin said, when Hyunjin falls, the jogging girl has her arms out ready to catch her to stop her from hitting the ground. Even with her board rolling away onto the street, Heejin is only focused on calming Hyunjin down. Using a hand to brush Hyunjin’s hair behind her ear and away from her face, Heejin focuses on getting the other girl’s attention on her eyes.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

Hyunjin nods, her sweaty hands shaking slightly in Heejin’s. Running a hand through Hyunjin’s hair, Heejin does what she can to ease the girl’s nerves.

 

“You did really well. I should have told you not to lean too much before, but, that’s on me.”

 

Hyunjin nods her head and leans her forehead against Heejin’s to calm herself down.

 

After a moment, Hyunjin squeezes the other girl’s hand and Heejin notices how her eyes burn in determination.

 

“I wanna try again.”

 

“Again?”

 

“I wanna get it right.”

 

Heejin feels herself smile at Hyunjin’s determination and perseverance, “Need to hold my hand?”

 

Hyunjin shakes head and retrieves Heejin’s board, “No. I’ll hold it later, though.”

 

Watching Hyunjin kick off again, it’s clear to see how much more confident she feels to be on the longboard.

 

Heejin knows that Hyunjin is incredibly determined when she wants to be, doesn’t know if it’s because that’s how she intrinsically is or if it’s because of what she has been taught in her vigorous preparation to inherit her family business.

 

Heejin thinks it’s something innate, but, she also thinks she’s biased because to her, everything about Hyunjin is blissful and incredible.

 

To have a father so jaded and a home so cold, Hyunjin is warm and more caring than she thinks. The way she welcomed Jiwoo and Jungeun and Heejin into her life says more than words could ever describe. For a girl that has only known competition and selfishness, she is admiringly selfless.

 

Heejin also knows this—Hyunjin is lonely.

 

And she makes a promise to herself to make sure Hyunjin doesn’t go a day without feeling needed and cherished, like she has someone to come to after hard days.

 

Because a part of Heejin already needs her—needs to see her smile, hear her childishly joyful laughter, and to be around her—and it didn’t take long for Heejin to begin cherishing her. In fact, all it took was the one night Hyunjin came over to Jiwoo’s for dinner and watched her and Jungeun play Overcooked. The moment Heejin heard her laugh, she knew she was a goner.

 

(When they walk home, Hyunjin gets on the board and reaches for Heejin’s hand to hold and she points forward with her other hand, “Onward, my loyal steed!”

 

Heejin looks between her longboard and Hyunjin before pointing at herself with her free hand, “S- steed?”

 

Hyunjin only looks back at her, unfazed, “Onward, my loyal steed!”

 

Heejin, being the lovesick girl that she is, takes the opportunity to make Hyunjin laugh and whinnies like a horse—even if it meant embarrassing herself in public.

 

Hyunjin’s laugh rings out and it’s worth all of the shame in the world.)

 

When Hyunjin drops Heejin off at the shared apartment she has with Jungeun and Jiwoo, Heejin sneaks a kiss on Hyunjin’s cheek after unlocking her door and both of their faces flame up in rosy nerves and shyness. Heejin doesn’t give Hyunjin a chance to say bye when she disappears behind her door, her back against it with her heart racing behind her chest.

 

Heejin hears how Hyunjin breathes a sound of laughter from behind the door. Leaning her shoulder and the side of her head against the door, Hyunjin closes her eyes, her heart at peace, “Thank you for tonight, Heejin. I’ll see you later.”

 

Hyunjin is halfway to her car when she receives a text from Heejin.

 

 **_Flower Thief:_ ** _your smile is really beautiful. i’m glad i got to see it a lot tonight :D_

 

The smile that braces Hyunjin’s lips is involuntary.

 

 **_Cemetery Girl:_ ** _Well, you gave me a lot of reasons to smile tonight, Heejin._

 

(Even with promises made in the air, Heejin loyally keeps to fulfilling them.

 

Heejin has not only found reasons for Hyunjin to smile, but, she has _become_ a reason for her to smile. Hyunjin doesn’t have it in her yet to tell her that though.)

 

~.~.~

 

The Chuul is doing better than projected.

 

With Mr. Ha investing in Hyunjin and Jiwoo and giving them the resources, they have produced small batches of the technology. Between Hyunjin having companies looking into the product and talking to various distributors and Jiwoo advertising it on her social media, Jungeun screaming about it from the second-floor balcony of the Humanities building, and Heejin throwing out flyers on her way to class on her skateboard, a surprising amount of attention is directed towards Jiwoo’s invention.

 

The timing is perfect with Spring Break on the horizon. Spring Break means college students being reckless with alcohol and drugs and leaving their cares to the wind. The Chuul is just right for the peak of school partying and havoc. Even if it’s just one measure of security, it could mean the world to someone.

 

Hyunjin doesn’t have to report back to her father for him to hear of her progress. His voice is gruff and bland, but still, ever so condescending—Hyunjin fucking hates it.

 

“I see that the girl’s idea is doing well.”

 

“What do you want, father?”

 

He laughs over the line. It’s anything but genuine.

 

“Can’t a father call his daughter to check up on her?”

 

Hyunjin rolls her eyes and does her best to keep emotion out of her voice. Emotionless means indifference. Indifference means winning. And God, does she want to win.

 

(And the audacity for him to call her his daughter—he stopped treating her like one when he stopped loving her and started treating her like an investment for his piggy bank to rely on when his weight got too much for his knees to handle.

 

Hyunjin thinks that the man can just crumble for all she cares—he would never deserve to have her compassion and empathy.)

 

“Sure, a father can do that. But, I know you. You only call when you need something from me. So, what is it?”

 

“Seems I have taught you well, Hyunjin. I want in.”

 

Hyunjin almost scoffs. Her father liked to play that card often, liked reaping the rewards when the hard work is done. Conniving and manipulative, he knows how to slip right on through. But, Hyunjin knows his tricks, lived with his manipulation and clever word play. She won’t let him win, won’t let him gain control of her life again, won’t let him dictate her friend’s.

 

More than herself, Jiwoo is hers to protect—her innocence, genuineness, and good intentions. Hyunjin promises to keep her away from the poison that is the man on the phone with her.

 

“So you believe me now? Too little too late, father. Mr. Ha, Jiwoo, and I have already signed a contract. If you want in, you know what you need to do.”

 

(Her father hangs up without a goodbye. It’s nothing new.)

 

Hyunjin so badly wanted to say, “I’ll never let you in.” But, that means conceding, that means showing what she truly feels. She couldn’t have her father knowing what she cares about, who she cares about more importantly.

 

(Worse than vultures, her father is a wolf in sheep’s clothing and he is cruel and ruthless and at the slightest indication of vulnerability and weakness, he’ll come snarling and snapping in to bite at the neck.)

 

Hyunjin has lived her whole life without feeling enough to become weak—she could pretend invulnerability if she needed to even if Jiwoo, Jungeun, and Heejin has given her enough happiness and love to feel for her to become soft to the world.

 

Hyunjin knows the type of entrepreneur she wants to be, the kind of woman she wants to be.

 

Everything her father isn’t, she will be.

 

She’ll be kind and generous, fair and considerate. Her heart wants to show empathy for others and passion for ideals that she believes in. She wants to give platforms to people who have good intentions and to give credit when it is due.

 

She won’t become the man her father is. She won’t make the people she loves feel inferior or worthless. When she comes to love someone (she’s already halfway there), she promises to show it enough that they would never have to doubt her heart. If she has children, Hyunjin knows that she would love them unconditionally and endlessly and promises to herself that she won’t put an innocent and loving child through a world so bleak and depressing as the one she grew up in.

 

But, to do this all, she needs to sever the tie that latches her father to her. If that meant signing her name away from Kim Industries, Hyunjin wants to take advantage of the resources handed to her. With the reputation her last name brings, Hyunjin has credibility, the means to get money from her father if she needed it, and the connections to go to.

 

Hyunjin will keep her friends close, but, her enemy even closer. She is a businesswoman anyway. Resources, if they are hers, are hers to use—she’ll sap away at the things her father has handed to her if it means that she could start building her own enterprise.

 

The day that Kim Industries crumbles to the floor, Hyunjin will be sure that she will not be in the rubble when it crashes.

 

She’ll build her own enterprise on good morals and an indubitable foundation. With the knowledge her father has force fed her, Hyunjin knows how to detect what is beneficial for companies and how to get it. With Jiwoo, Jungeun, and Heejin teaching her what love and compassion feels like, Hyunjin knows how to go about what she desires fairly and equitably.

 

No matter what it takes, Hyunjin will win this war between her father. She won’t let him puppeteer her the way he has been her whole life. If that means she has to play a little dirty, Hyunjin has no qualms fighting someone whose hands are black with soot from lies and manipulate power plays.

 

~

 

The first time Hyunjin breaks a law, it’s with Heejin.

 

_“It’s just trespassing private property! And vandalism. But, what’s the point of breaking one rule when you could break more?”_

 

_Hyunjin balks and hides her face further behind the hand that Heejin has raised to better cover her eyes from the bright and beaming sun filtering in through the window. “We shouldn’t break any laws, Heekkie! What if we get caught?”_

 

_Heejin closes her eyes and leans back against the couch, “We won’t get caught, Hyunjin. Literally, no one ever goes to that lot anymore.”_

 

_Hyunjin relaxes into Heejin’s body behind her and the steady breathing against her back eases her worries more than it should, “Are you sure?”_

 

_Heejin blinks an eye open and tilts Hyunjin’s chin towards her and the smile on her face is slight but it does its job at reassuring the girl, “I promise that we won’t get caught, Hyunjin.”_

 

So, that’s why Hyunjin finds herself dressed in all black, scaling a rusty fence, and hoping to God that no one sees her.

 

(Hyunjin likes to say that she doesn’t break the rules because breaking rules wastes her time, but, she is also a goody two shoes at heart. Rules existed for a reason and Hyunjin never liked straying away from them. But, she liked Heejin and if the other girl wanted to trespass private property to graffiti random animals on a wall, then, Hyunjin couldn’t possibly find it in her to say no.)

 

(Jiwoo says she’s whipped. Jungeun only eggs her on by trying to mimic the sounds that whips make.

 

It’s not like they were wrong so Hyunjin just bears their teasing.)

 

(Later on in the night when Hyunjin and Jungeun get snacks for their session of game night, Jungeun makes her stay put.

 

“Listen. I don’t know whatever it is you feel for Heekkie, but, she likes you. In what way, I don’t know, but, I just know that you’re special to her. And I don’t want to give you some pointless threat that I probably could never fulfill because Jiwoo is my restraint, but, just know, that I’m not above risking it all for her. Heejin’s been my friend since Jiwoo and I were kids. She’s been through a lot and we promised to protect each other through thick and thin. And I really hope that I won’t have to protect her from you because I really like you. Jiwoo too. You’ve snuck your way into our little family and it’d be our greatest loss if you’re not who we think you are.”

 

Hyunjin’s arm aches from carrying the cartons of juice, but, she doesn’t falter when she reassures the girl, “I can’t guarantee that I won’t hurt her, but, I can promise you it’ll never be in my intentions to. I know what it feels like to be hurt by someone who should love you and I never want to make Heejin feel like that. She means a lot to me, Jungeun. My friendship with you three, it’s everything to me. I would never go out of my way to ruin the one thing that has taught and shown me what love is. And in Heejin’s own way, she has become my safety away from everything. She protects me when I feel small and I have already promised to myself that I’d do the same for her.”

 

Jungeun raises an eyebrow and takes one of the shopping bags from her, “So, you love her?”

 

Hyunjin rolls her eyes and groans, “I say all of that and that’s the only thing you hear?”

 

The older girl laughs and bumps into Hyunjin’s shoulder, “I heard the whole thing and that’s pretty much what I got in your message. You love her enough to know you’re not perfect, but, you’re still willing to do what you can to be good enough for her. You don’t have to say I love you to say I love you, Hyunjin. I think if anyone listened to you talking about her, they would know how your heart feels.”

 

“Do you think Heejin knows?”

 

Jungeun scoffs, “Girl would ask for clarification even if you spelled it out for her. She’s painfully dense.”

 

Hyunjin breathes a sigh of relief. At least _everyone_ didn't know about her feelings. For the first time, Hyunjin is glad her father is so estranged and distant. If he even looked her in the eyes instead of the paperwork he is always reading, he would know at the flash of lightning that something in Hyunjin changed. Her eyes are no longer dead and emotionless. These days, they’re brighter and more hopeful, alive with love and brimming with affection.)

 

Whisper shouting at the girl below on the other side of the fence, Hyunjin looks down at her, “Heejin, I’m scared.”

 

Heejin who had just climbed over puts her backpack on the floor. “I’ve got you, you big scaredy cat! Just trust me on this. We’re breaking the rules, but, I promise it’ll be worth it.”

 

And like always when Heejin beckons for Hyunjin’s trust, it’ll be right at her call. Scaling down and to the other side, Heejin throws an arm around her shoulder and kisses her cheek as she leads them further into the lot.

 

(It’s comforting and reassuring and Hyunjin loves how it makes her heart feel at ease.)

 

Walking to an empty wall, Heejin reaches in her backpack to pull out a can of pink paint spray. For a girl so used to trespassing and vandalizing, she draws the cutest pictures of bunnies and cats. It’s an odd juxtaposition that makes Hyunjin snicker. Watching her even more, Heejin fishes in her pocket and pulls out a lollipop. Instead of throwing the trash on the floor, she stuffs it back in her pocket.

 

_“I’m not about to contribute to the world’s weight of pollution by littering. I may be fine with breaking the law, but, I’m not okay with breaking Mother Nature’s heart, Hyunjin.”_

 

Sticking the lollipop in her mouth and graffiti painting some more, Heejin looks a bit like a baby trying to copy her older sibling doing bad things.

 

_“Smoking cigarettes is super nasty. My dad sacrificed a lot of money to get my teeth straight and nice. I’m not going to ruin his hard work by rotting my teeth. And plus, like, cancer isn’t cool—I’d like to avoid that as much as possible.”_

 

Heejin’s dad isn’t something she talks about often. Sometimes, in passing, she’ll mention him like she just did, but, Hyunjin only hears how Heejin truly feels for him one night after Hyunjin practices longboarding on Heejin’s board.

 

_“My dad and I were really close. He taught me how to play guitar and showed me a lot about love. I mean, of course, my mom did too, but, I was always daddy’s little girl. He had a soft spot for me and I had one for him too. I remember when he had to go away for work, I would call him every other day and he would call me in the days between. I would tell him about my day and even if it was an uneventful day for me, he would listen as if it was the most interesting piece of news. And sometimes we’d just laugh together on the phone and I never realized how much that made me miss him less. I never knew how much I’d miss his laugh until I couldn’t hear it anymore.”_

 

_Hyunjin watches as Heejin begins to curl into herself. It’s the first time she sees the usually emboldened girl look vulnerable. Hyunjin wants to reach her hands out to hold Heejin’s, but, a part of her is reluctant, unsure if the girl needed space or her comfort._

 

_Heejin curls her fingers into fists and normally, Hyunjin would coo at how tiny they look all balled up, but, the tension in them makes her heart hurt._

 

_“When I was thirteen, I was getting tossed around by life. The usual teen angst shit. I don’t even remember what I was fighting him over, but, I just remember going to sleep angry with him. And the next morning, he made me lunch like he always does and I didn’t kiss his cheek before leaving like I always do. When he was home, I never missed a single day since preschool. Except that one day. And I still regret not doing it. When I came home from school, I had the time to calm down and I wanted to talk to him, but, he never came home. My mom got a call later on in the night that my dad had a stroke while driving and crashed. Hard enough to pass out. Long story short, he made it, but, his brain didn’t have enough oxygen and he reached a vegetative state. He didn’t have the motor skills to look at me or smile or hold my hand when I cried by his bedside. And all I could think about was how I had been so mean to him and how he went to work knowing I was mad at him. And how maybe he was driving home with the intention to apologize because that’s the kind of dad that he is.”_

 

_Heejin doesn’t cry, but, Hyunjin sees her eyes glaze over._

 

_“I hate that his last thought could’ve been about me and how we weren’t okay. I hate that I couldn’t hear I love you from him one last time or kiss his cheek goodbye and feel his cheekbones rise from smiling. I hate that I let myself get so caught up in something so stupid and meaningless. For so long, I held this grudge against myself. I spiraled. I started skipping school and getting detention. I talked back to teachers, to my mom. I stopped caring about being good when the person who taught me how to be good left. Even Jungeun and Jiwoo couldn’t get through to me. They tried so hard to get me back on track, but, I didn’t want to. I didn’t give a shit anymore.”_

 

_Heejin drags in a deep breath and Hyunjin watches as the girl relaxes her fingers and taps her fingers against her thighs._

 

_“Then, spring came and the daffodils in our garden sprung. My dad loved daffodils. He said that they reminded him of me. And seeing the flowers, it forced me to think about how much I missed him. So, I picked a flower and got on my bike and rode to the cemetery. And going to my dad’s grave, I knew my mom had to have visited recently because his tombstone was clean and had daffodils next to it. I never thought about how hard it must have been for her. I had been so suffocated in my guilt that I forgot other people were suffering too. So, I just sat there for hours—listening to the birds and the cars passing by, talking to him. I think I missed him so much in the beginning that I imagined his voice laughing whenever I made dumb jokes. Being there, it reminded me of what he spent his whole life teaching me. And that is to love unconditionally and wholeheartedly, to bring happiness to anyone needing it. And I want to make him proud by doing that. The people I come to love, I want to do it fearlessly and loyally. I want to make the people that I love happy. I want him to be proud of me. Even if he’s not with me, I want him to know that I love him still and even if he’ll never know it, I do, and that’s enough for me.”_

 

_Hyunjin waits a moment to see if Heejin had more to say. When the other girl reaches for her hand and laces their fingers together, Hyunjin takes her signal to go._

 

_“I think he’d be so proud of you, Heejin. How you’ve grown and how you put your heart on your sleeve—I admire you. I never planned on telling you this, but, I think it’s worth you knowing. My father is a grade A asshole that never showed me love or care, that we know. But, you are the first person in my life that made me feel like I was more than just a dollar sign. And we were just strangers at the time. You calmed me down like no other and all it would take is you smiling at me. Even if you don’t love me, you make me so happy. You make me feel like I’m worth something more than just an investment or capital. Life before you and Jiwoo and Jungeun was meaningless. All I had going for me was wanting to please a man who would never be sated. And I was fine with being used like that. But, then I met you three and now I see that I have reasons to live outside of my father. I want to live for myself, accomplish my own goals and expectations. I want to be a better person than he is; I want to be proud of myself. And I don’t know if it is fate or destiny or coincidence that led me to where I am right now, but, I wouldn’t take anything back or change the past events. Your dad taught you how to be good, but, it’s because of your heart why you’re so kind and wonderful and everything my father isn’t. You’re good because you are and anyone who gets to have the privilege of having you in their life would be proud of you—I know I am.”_

 

_(Heejin doesn’t say it, but, she does love her. Even more so after hearing Hyunjin’s heart. Heejin thinks that her vulnerability is her strength—how she gives herself to others despite being hurt before and how she is so driven to be better. It’s so easy to be bitter after being hurt, but, Hyunjin is nothing but that.)_

 

Grabbing a paint spray can, Hyunjin writes on the wall. Heejin squints at the writing, the lack of light not helping her already bad eyesight.

 

“What does that say?”

 

“I love you.”

 

“Oh. Why’d you write-”

 

“I love you, Heejin.”

 

The girl drops the cap of her spray paint can and rapidly turns towards her. Heejin’s lollipop rests against her bottom lip.

 

“Are you serious?”

 

“I wouldn’t be breaking laws to be with you if I didn’t.”

 

Heejin raises her eyebrows in shock.

 

“Holy shit. You love me.”

 

Hyunjin laughs at the blissful awe on the girl’s face.

 

“Yeah. I do.”

 

Heejin shakes the can in her hand before spray painting a massive heart around the bunny and cat that she drew. At the bottom, of the heart, Heejin writes something too.

 

_JHJ+KHJ 4EVER_

 

Hyunjin laughs at the scribble, her heart feeling light knowing that Heejin loved her back.

 

“Are you sure you’re an art major?”

 

Heejin playfully shoves at Hyunjin’s shoulder, but, the laugh that spills from her lips is warm and everything Hyunjin loves in a sound. Reaching for Heejin’s free hand, Hyunjin pulls her closer.

 

“Take that lollipop out of your mouth, Heekkie.”

 

“Why? Got something against strawberry?”

 

Hyunjin laughs and taps at Heejin’s nose with her finger, “No, but, I wanna kiss you.”

 

Heejin’s eyebrows raise again, “Oh! Well. If that’s the case then, give me a second.”

 

The skater retrieves the wrapper that she put in her pocket before eating the candy. Finding it, Heejin wraps her lollipop again and carefully puts it back into her pocket. Wrapping her arms around Hyunjin’s neck and looking back at her, Hyunjin can barely see the mole by Heejin’s eye.

 

“I’m ready now.”

 

Hyunjin laughs and nuzzles her nose against Heejin’s, “You’re a dork.”

 

Heejin smiles and edges even closer to her, “A dork that loves you.”

 

Hyunjin’s first kiss is brief and slightly sticky from the sugar the lollipop left on Heejin’s lips, but, Hyunjin likes strawberry so that isn’t a problem. And she loves Heejin. So, she loves kissing Heejin too.

 

Heejin kisses her before she scales up the fence when they finish graffiti painting the walls. Hyunjin kisses her when she gets over to the other side. And when Hyunjin drives them back to Heejin’s shared apartment, she kisses the back of her hand at every red light.

 

Hyunjin sleeps over and waking up in Heejin’s arms is bliss. When she walks out of the room to go to the bathroom, she mumbles her greeting to Jungeun who is eating breakfast on the couch.

 

Hyunjin sleeping over is normal. Heejin coming out later than her is normal too. But, Heejin kissing her good morning after brushing her teeth is new.

 

While Jiwoo is washing her face in the bathroom, Jungeun is with them in the kitchen and her jaw drops in shock. Abandoning her breakfast, she pulls Heejin by the hand and promptly tackles her to the floor before sitting on her.

 

Groaning from the weight on top of her, Heejin takes a moment to reorient herself. (She was just enjoying how soft Hyunjin’s lips felt and suddenly all she could see was Hyunjin’s legs standing in front of her.

 

“Jiwooming! Your best friend has been holding something back from us!”

 

“What do you mean _your_ best friend? She’s yours too!”

 

“Your business partner in crime has been keeping secrets too!”

 

Soon enough, Hyunjin is on the floor with Heejin, Jiwoo straddling her back and using a far more technical move to pin her down.

 

“Heejin kissed Hyunjin, Jiwoo!”

 

Like two studio speakers in their ears, the couple exclaims, “What are you hiding from us?”

 

Heejin groans again and tries to wriggle her arms free, “Literally nothing! I actually _showed_ you something!”

 

“Yeah! You kissing Hyunjin!”

 

Heejin’s voice is strained as she tries to roll on her stomach, “Yeah! I kissed Hyunjin. I don’t go kissing random people!”

 

Suddenly, Jungeun’s weight disappears, “Oh yeah. You’re right. Sorry for sitting on you.”

 

Jiwoo, who is still straddling Hyunjin’s back, gets off of her and pulls her up with one hand. (It is startling how much strength this living ball of cuteness has.)

 

“Congrats on the dating!”

 

Heejin blushes red, and as much as she loves her friends, they really could get on her nerves.

 

Heejin doesn’t fester in her embarrassment for too long because Hyunjin kisses her before leaving to change.

 

Before Hyunjin leaves for her classes, she kisses her goodbye and it’s incredible how domestic things already feel with her. But, Heejin likes it—likes being comfortable around her and not having to awkwardly dance around their new relationship.

 

(But, really, if it came to Hyunjin, she’d like most things anyway).

 

~.~.~

 

When Hyunjin and Jiwoo got Mr. Ha’s office for an update report on the Chuul, their investor is obvious with his pride and satisfaction.

 

“You are doing a great job at marketing this, ladies. It’s being received well and your numbers are higher than I expected for them to be.”

 

Hyunjin and Jiwoo bow respectfully.

 

“It’s thanks to you, Mr. Ha. We wouldn’t be able to do this if it weren’t for your faith in us and your financial support.”

 

The investor stands up from his desk, but, Hyunjin knows well enough from the countenance on his face that the change in stance is not a power play. Even if the two girls have to look up at him to make eye contact, Mr. Ha still maintains a kind and welcoming disposition for them.

 

Hyunjin is not familiar with such respect.

 

(It feels so good to have it.)

 

Before Hyunjin and Jiwoo leave, the former asks for a bit of Mr. Ha’s time. While Jiwoo leaves to wait in the lobby, Hyunjin is invited to sit at the seat in front of the man’s desk while he sits in his own chair behind it.

 

“What can I do for you, Miss. Kim?”

 

Hyunjin takes a breath to steel her nerves, “I want to start my own enterprise away from Kim Industries and I respect you for your work and your attitude.”

 

The man raises his eyebrows, “And you don’t respect your father’s?”

 

Hyunjin knew to expect this question and answers it truthfully but not enough to reveal too much, “My father and I have different means in carrying out business and I would like to try my own hand at it. If you’ll give me the chance and the honor, I would gladly be your protégé.”

 

Mr. Ha asks for a week’s time to consider her proposal. When he contacts her a week later, he has a contract on his desk waiting for Hyunjin’s signature.

 

“You’ve shown a lot of capability and knowledge in the past year, Miss. Kim. You successfully guided someone who knows very little about business into creating her own profit. You have never claimed her work as your own and you have a genuine heart. Being in this for as long as I have, I know who is showing me their true selves and you’ve been nothing but honest to me, Miss. Kim.”

 

When Hyunjin signs the contract, Mr. Ha shakes her hand and welcomes her as his understudy. Already, he gives her projects, most with people overlooking her work, but, there is one where she is the leader for it. Granted, the project is small, but, Hyunjin already sees how Mr. Ha believes in her enough to give her control.

 

Already, Mr. Ha is doing more for her advancement as an entrepreneur than her father ever did for her. With her name signed on legal documents, Hyunjin also promises to herself that she won’t disappoint someone who has given her the opportunity she has been aching for.

 

The following day, Hyunjin contacts her father with explicit intention.

 

“I’m calling to discuss my contract with you, father.”

 

“And what possibly could you want with that contract?”

 

“I want out.”

 

For once, her father doesn’t have something smart to say back. It’s the first time Hyunjin hears emotion in his voice.

 

“You- you want out?”

 

“I don’t want to be a part of Kim Industries anymore.”

 

Then, she hears anger.

 

“How could you want out? This is everything you wanted when you were younger! This is everything I prepared you for!”

 

Hyunjin remains neutral, motivated to end the war with a strong finish.

 

“It’s not your business for you to know why, father. By law, if you will not be collaborative and agree on an arranged time for us to meet, I have the resources to bring in a third party.”

 

Her father chooses to resign and allows his daughter this. There was no point in getting lawyers. Her father knows a losing game when he sees it. And he knows he’s at the lower hand this time. It’s the first time he loses. (He figures that he could only lose to the person who he hurt the most.)

 

When Hyunjin meets with him, a part of her knows that this might be the last time she sees him for a very long time. The two meet a termination of the contract Hyunjin signed when she was fifteen with a fee that she must pay at her cancellation. Using her share of the money she earned with the Chuul, Hyunjin pays off the fee.

 

Before leaving, Hyunjin breaks and lets her emotions show for the first time in front of her father since she started fighting back in the war they were caught in.

 

“When I was younger, I didn’t want this. All I wanted was for you to love me back. All I wanted was your respect and your attention, but, you never gave me that. You never made me feel loved and I pity you. You’ve been so desolate that you forced me into isolation too. But, I’m not like you. I won’t be like you. I don’t want to die alone like you will.”

 

When she drives away from her father’s house, Hyunjin feels genuinely free and in complete control of her life. Greater than the victory that she predicted she’d feel (which is pretty damn great), it is the overwhelming sense of being able to breathe. For so long, Hyunjin has been caught in a game with her father. Finally being able to put it to rest gives her the peace she has been craving for.

 

Stopping at Heejin’s apartment complex, Hyunjin pulls out her phone to text her. She has much to tell her girlfriend, and honestly, she really needs a hug from her right now. She needs her comfort and her affection and to feel safe while she is wrapped in her vulnerability. Just seeing Heejin’s contact picture on her phone is enough for her to feel more at ease.

 

 **_Cemetery Girl:_ ** _Want to go with me to buy flowers? I’m going to visit my mom today to update her on my life._

 

 **_Flower Thief:_ ** _i would love to but the zero’s in my bank account are giving me a hard no. i’ll go with you to the cemetery though!!! my monthly news update is due :D_

 

 **_Cemetery Girl:_ ** _A couple of daffodils aren’t going to hurt my wallet. And plus, it’s better that you don’t steal from dead people anymore. At least you could give me kisses in compensation._

 

 **_Flower Thief:_ ** _im gonna kiss you whether or not you buy flowers for me but i’ll take you up on that offer <3 _

 

Even in Heejin’s words, Hyunjin feels her heart coming to peace and her shoulders relaxing its tension. Heejin is someone who she will always remember. No matter what happens to them, Hyunjin knows that a girl like Heejin is one in a million and being the one for her is a privilege that she’ll never take advantage of.

 

Hyunjin understood why daffodils reminded Heejin’s father of his daughter. Like daffodils that bloom in the spring, Heejin is the flower that brightens up her life.

 

 **_Cemetery Girl:_ ** _I love you, Heekkie._

 

 **_Flower Thief:_ ** _i love you double baby!!_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> as always, thank you for reading and giving me your time!! leave me some feedback if you'd like; i'd really appreciate it :3
> 
> (also pls lmk if my humor is funny.. .. i need to know how embarrassed i'll be if i'm the only one thinking that what i write is even slightly funny.)
> 
> catch me on twitter/cc @twinklingsana if you wanna find me there :D


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